.Editor's Details: The complying with is the text message of a character from Expedition Three Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Resigned), reflecting on the celebrations of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't composed very much regarding specifics of this particular purpose during the course of the month I've been right here, mostly for two factors: the first being that there has been incredibly little opportunity to accomplish that kind of composing, as well as secondly given that I am actually not exactly sure just how pleasant I am sharing thought and feelings I provide family and friends with the remainder of the globe.Well, definitely the world modified today. What I state or even do is actually very minor matched up to the value of what happened to our country today when it was attacked by ... through whom? Revolutionaries is all we know, I presume. Challenging to understand at whom to guide our temper and also fear ...I had just completed a variety of tasks this morning, the absolute most time-consuming being the physical examinations of all team members. In an exclusive conversation complying with that, the air travel doctor informed me they were possessing a very poor day on the ground. I had no concept ...He illustrated the situation to me as ideal he recognized it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was astonished, then terrified. My 1st thought was actually that this wasn't a genuine chat, that I was still paying attention to some of my Tom Clancy tapes. It simply didn't seem feasible on this incrustation in our nation. I couldn't also think of the particulars, also just before the headlines of additional devastation started can be found in.Vladimir came over fairly quickly, picking up that something very serious was actually being actually reviewed. I waved Michael into the element at the same time. They were additionally astounded and also stunned. After we authorized off, I tried to explain to Vladimir as well as Michael as ideal I might the prospective immensity of the show of terror in midtown Manhattan as well as at the Pentagon. They clearly comprehended as well as were incredibly thoughtful.I browsed the Globe Chart on the personal computer to observe where over the world our team were and observed that our experts were happening southeast out of Canada as well as would certainly be actually passing over New England in a few minutes. I zipped around the station up until I discovered a window that would certainly give me a viewpoint of NYC as well as took hold of the closest cam. It happened to become a camera, and I was actually looking southern coming from the window of Michael's cabin.The smoke cigarettes appeared to have an odd blossom to it at the bottom of the column that was streaming south of the city. After reading through among the news articles our team merely acquired, I believe our company were actually looking at NY around the moment of, or quickly after, the crash of the second tower. Exactly how dreadful ...I panned the camera the whole time the East Shoreline to the south to see if I can view every other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or even anywhere else, but nothing showed up.It was pretty tough to think of job after that, though we possessed some to do, but on the next orbit our team moved across the United States more south. All 3 people were operating 1 or 2 electronic cameras to try to obtain views of New york city or even Washington. There was actually fog over Washington, yet no certain resource could be seen. It all appeared incredible from 2 to 3 hundred miles away. I can not think of the heartbreaking settings on the ground.Aside from the psychological influence of our country being attacked and thousands of our consumers and also possibly some friends being gotten rid of, one of the most mind-boggling emotion being where I am actually is one of seclusion.Upcoming day ... I think the fatigue and also emotional strain received the most ideal of me. I could not stay awake and also remain to compose. Today was still challenging, but our team began obtaining more relevant information, plus we possessed the tribute of speaking straight along with the Center Supervisor, Roy Estess, who guaranteed us that the ground teams would certainly continue to work and also guarantee our protection, and also the secure function of the Station. Our experts additionally talked to our Supervisor, Mr. Goldin, that included that the companions in the Plan are actually all absolutely devoted to carrying on secure operations and assistance. These were actually never questions for me. I recognize all these individuals! The ground groups have been actually incredibly supporting, quite understanding of the influence of the news, as well as have tried to become as valuable as possible. They have actually all been incredibly expert and also centered though I can't imagine the interruption of the kind of news can be found in as well as the idea that authorities structures may be vulnerable. They never ever bypassed a beat, even when relocating nerve center. As well as a team of senior workers and friends provided us a pretty complete briefing about what was actually understood and what was actually being carried out in the federal government and at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was actually extremely beneficial as well as type of them to perform in the midst of all the chaos. The Russian TsUP has actually also been actually supportive as well as beneficial, trying to uplink news articles when our personal assets were unusable, and also saying kind words ...My crewmates have been actually excellent, also. They know it's been actually a difficult day for me and also the individuals on the ground, and also they've attempted to be as even keeled and also valuable as possible. Michael even corrected me my favored Borscht soup for dinner. As well as they offer me plenty of space to presume when I needed it. They are actually extremely supportive and obviously shocked at whoever would certainly perform this.I know so many people in Washington, so many individuals who journey to DC as well as New York City, many who are flies, that I experienced sure I would get at least a couple of pieces of trouble over the upcoming couple of days. I obtained the 1st one today when I learned that the Captain of the American Airlines jet that attacked the Government was Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I came across Chic in the course of plebe summer months when we were in the D&B together, and our experts possessed great deals of training class with each other. I can not visualize what he needs to of looked at, as well as right now I hear that he may have risen further than our experts can even consider by possibly stopping his aircraft coming from being the one to tackle the White Property. What a horrendous loss, yet I ensure Chic was actually dealing with fearlessly throughout. And also rips do not circulate the same in space ...It is actually complicated to explain just how it feels to become the only American entirely off the earth each time like this. The feeling that I ought to be there along with every one of you, coping with this, assisting somehow, is actually frustrating. I understand that we perform the threshold (or beyond) of an awful switch in the record of the world. Many points are going to never coincide again after September 11, 2001. Certainly not just for the 1000s as well as thousands of folks directly affected by these horrendous actions of violence, but possibly for we all. We will discover ourselves really feeling differently regarding loads of points, consisting of most likely space exploration, unfortunately.It is actually awful to find smoke cigarettes putting from wounds in your personal nation from such a wonderful point of view. The dichotomy of getting on a space probe devoted to enhancing everyday life on the planet and checking out life being ruined through such premeditated, horrendous process is actually jolting to the mind, regardless of that you are actually. And also the expertise that whatever will certainly be actually different than when we launched due to the opportunity we land is a little disconcerting. I believe in our nation and also in our management that our company will definitely do every little thing achievable to better defend her and also our family members, and to bring justice of what has been performed. I possess self-confidence that the great people at NASA are going to perform everything necessary to proceed our goal safely and also return our company securely at the correct time. And also I overlook all of you quite. I can't be there along with you personally, and we have a very long way to head to accomplish our purpose, but be certain that my center is with you, and also understand you remain in my requests.Humbly, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An improve to the final letter ... The good news is, it's been actually a busy week up here. And also to show that, like our country, our experts are advancing our designated pathway along with company customarily (as much as possible). Tonight the most recent addition to the station, the Russian Docking Compartment will be actually introduced coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Sunday night (US opportunity), it will dock along with us, at a port certainly never used prior to on the nadir edge of the Solution Component. This new module will provide us yet another area to dock an Improvement or Soyuz and also will certainly deliver a sizable airlock with pair of useable hatches for conducting EVA's in Russian Orlan fits, which we will definitely carry out a few of prior to our team return.The issue just before in taking care of recently was inadequate information. The problem right now is a lot of. It came simultaneously when e-mail was actually recovered, and there's not enough opportunity to read all of it! Plus it's also tough to handle all of it at once. Yet I appreciate acquiring it, as well as I truly cherish the wonderful letters of support and also companionship I am receiving.We are actually doing well on board, receiving our job performed, and talking about points. Last evening we had a long discussion over supper regarding the importance of these occasions, the feasible actions to observe, and also what must be performed. After supper, Michael made a point of informing me that every email he received from good friends in Russia claimed specifically to tell me exactly how sorry they were that this taken place, prolonging their acknowledgements, and asking exactly how I was actually carrying out. Vladimir instructed me the Russian phrase for "condolences" after talking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Celebrity Area. (Both the Russian and the English phrases are actually much extremely long to pronounce conveniently.) Quite kind folks.For the final pair of days, the Russian MCC has actually sufficed to send online shows of broadcast headlines concerning the activity and connected accounts, to ensure I was properly notified. Every specialist that has begun the line to cover a procedure or a problem contends some point stretched introductions to me along with kind words. Tonight the Russian capcom informed our team that because of the special day of remembrance in the United States, all day people had been actually carrying florals and lining all the wall surfaces of the United States embassy in Moscow, as well as this night they were actually igniting candles in the street outside the consulate. Exactly how the globe has altered.Folks anywhere appear to recognize the senselessness and terror in this strike. And also the tremendous loss. Moscow has taken care of these type of complications in the last couple of years along with apartment or condo as well as train battles, so they are actually as anxious to get rid of this hazard as our company are. Yet the bottom collection is that there are excellent people anywhere who desire to live in peace. I go through that a child inquired, "America is actually so good to other countries, our company regularly assist every person, how can they detest our team a great deal?".I hope the instance of collaboration and also trust fund that this space probe and all individuals in the system illustrate daily are going to someday encourage the remainder of the globe to function the same way. They must!Sadly, our company won't be flying over the United States during the time individuals are actually igniting candles. Do not know if our company can see that anyhow. Our company did, nonetheless, see a very unusual and stunning attraction a few minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz booster. Our company were eclipsing it as well as it appeared regarding three minutes after its own launch coming from Baikonur as the sunlight reached our station, so it was actually still unaware. It appeared like a large comet along with a directly, large tail silhouetted versus the dark world underneath. Despite some negative lights for some time as the sunshine struck our home window at a reduced position, I handled some online video of it as to begin with our experts passed the spacecraft, and afterwards enjoyed it start to mesmerize as it gained height and also rate. I recorded till major engine cutoff and enhancer splitting up occurred equally our company came close to dawn on the Mountain ranges. An unforgettable sight in a memorable week ...Life happens, also in space. Our company're right here to remain ... Frank.